Hariprasad’s Weblog

ಎಸ್ ಎಲ್ ಭೈರಪ್ಪನವರ ಕನ್ನಡ ಅಭಿಮಾನದ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಯಾರಿಗೂ ಯಾವ ರೀತಿಯ ಸಂಶಯ ಇಲ್ಲ. ಕನ್ನಡಕ್ಕೆ ಅವರ ಸೇವೆ – ಅದೊಂತೂ ಅದ್ಭುತ. ಹೀಗಿರುವಾಗ ಅವರು ಕನ್ನಡಿಗರ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ನೊಂದ ಮನಸ್ಸಿನಿಂದ ಏನೋ ಒಂದೆರೆಡು ಮಾತು ಹೇಳಿದ್ದಾರೆ ಅಂದರೆ ಅದರ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಅತಿರೇಕವಾದ ಪ್ರತಿಕ್ರಿಯ ಉಚಿತವಲ್ಲ.

ಮನೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ನಮ್ಮ ಅಜ್ಜ ನಾವು ಆಚೆ ಹೋಗಿ ಬರೇ ಆಟ ಆಡುತ್ತಾ ಕಾಳ ವ್ಯರ್ಥ ಮಾಡಿ ಓದದೆ ಇದ್ದಾಗ ನಮಗೆ ನಾಲ್ಕು ಬೈದು, ಬುದ್ಧಿಮಾತು ಹೇಳಿ, ತರ್ಲೆತನ ಬಿಡು, ಪಕ್ಕದ ಮನೆಯ ಹುಡುಗನ್ನನು ನೋಡು, ಅವನ ಹಾಗೆ ಓದು ಎಂದು ತಿಳಿ ಹೇಳಿದರೆ, ಅಜ್ಜನನ್ನೇ ಬೈಯ್ಯುವೆವಾ? ಅಥವಾ ಅಜ್ಜ ನೀನು ಕ್ಷಮೆ ಯಾಚಿಸಿದರೆ ಸರಿ, ಇಲ್ಲಾಂದರೆ ಏನ್ ಮಾಡ್ತೇನೆ ನೋಡು ಎಂದು ಬೆದರಿಸ್ತೀವಾ?

ಈ ಪರಿಸ್ಥಿತಿಯೂ ಹಾಗೆ. ಭೈರಪ್ಪನವರು ನಮ್ಮ ಕನ್ನಡ ಕುಟುಂಬದ ಹಿರಿಯ ಅಜ್ಜ. ಅವರು ನೊಂದು ಎರಡು ಬುದ್ಧಿ ಮಾತು ಹೇಳಿದ್ದಾರೆ ಎಂದರೆ ನಮ್ಮಲ್ಲಿ ಏನೋ ದೊಡ್ಡದಾದ (ತಪ್ಪು) ಬೆಳವಣಿಗೆಯನ್ನು ಕಂಡಿದ್ದಾರೆ ಎಂದರ್ಥ. ಅದೇನೆಂದು ಕೇಳಿ ತಿಳಿಯೋಣ. ಸರಿ ಪಡಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳೋಣ. ಅವರ ಕೈಯಲ್ಲೇ ಶಭಾಷ್ ಎನಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳೋಣ. ಅದು ಬಿಟ್ಟು ಅವರಲ್ಲೇ ಕ್ಷಮೆಯಾಚಿಸುವಂತೆ ಬೆದರಿಕೆ ಹಾಕುವ ದುರ್ಬುದ್ಧಿ ಬೇಡ!

Sri Yeddyurappa has released major ads in newspapers today highlighting the amount of land denotification that was done under the tenure of previous Congress and JD(S) Chief Ministers. The ad also highlights the discretionary site allocations made by previous chief ministers. The language of the ad is childish (for e.g. something like “Here are the details of the denotifications done by HD Kumaraswamy, who projects himself as if he is Satya Harischandra”)

If you catch any motorist in Bangalore on an unmanned junction for signal violation, the first thing he is likely to do is to point out how so many others are also doing the same. If you talk to anybody about bribing, the logic put forth would be similar. Everybody else does it, so do I. What’s wrong?

The leader of our state is using the same logic and standards. When other CMs have denotified lands and allocated sites, why are you singling me out?

The point, though, is not about what the previous ones did. It’s about whether such discretionary allocations and denotifications are legal and ethical, or not. But these politicians operate at a different level. They want the public to allow them to practice a certain level of corruption and unethical behavior. “Swalpa corruption aage aaguthe. Adjust maadi please..”

The majority of the public, I am sure, would sympathize with the emotional outbursts of the Chief Minister, especially in the light of his “I am not the only one doing this” revelations.

Times have changed. It is now “Yatha Prajaa, Tathaa Rajaa”.

We deserve them. We truly do!

ವಾರಕ್ಕೆ ೨-೩ ಬಾರಿ ನಾನು ದೇವರ ಪೂಜೆಗೆ ಹೂವು, ತುಲಸಿ ಖರೀದಿಸುತ್ತೇನೆ. ನೆನ್ನೆ ಹೂವು ಮಾರುವವಳ ಬಳಿ ತುಂಬಾ ಗ್ರಾಹಕರಿದ್ದ ಕಾರಣ ಕೊಂಚ ಕಾಯಬೇಕಾಯಿತು. ಆಗ ಗಮನಿಸಿದ ಒಂದು ಅಂಶ ನನ್ನನ್ನು ಆಲೋಚಿಸುವಂತೆ ಮಾಡಿತು.

ಹೂವು ಮಾರುವವಳು ಕನ್ನಡದವಳು. ಸ್ಥಳ ಬೆಂಗಳೂರು. ಆದರೂ ಖರೀದಿಸುವವರನ್ನು ನೋಡಿ ಅವರ ಭಾಷೆಯಲ್ಲೇ ಮಾತನಾಡುವ ಪ್ರಯತ್ನ ನಡೆಸುತ್ತಿದ್ದಳು. ಒಂದು ಬೆಂಗಾಳಿ ಹೆಂಗಸಿನೋಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ಅವಳ “ಹಿಂದಿ” ಸಂಭಾಷಣೆ ಕೇಳಿ ನನಗೆ ನಗೆ ತಡೆದುಕೊಳ್ಳುವುದು ಕಷ್ಟವಾಯಿತು. ಇನ್ನೊಂದು ಗ್ರಾಹಕನ ಒಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ನಡೆಸಿದ ತೆಲುಗು ಸಂಭಾಷಣೆ ನನಗೆ ತಲೆ ಬುಡ ಅರ್ಥವಾಗಲಿಲ್ಲ. ಆ ಗ್ರಾಹಕನ ಪಾಡು ನನ್ನಂತೆಯೇ ಇದ್ದದ್ದು ನೋಡಿ ಸ್ವಲ್ಪ ಸಮಾಧಾನವಾಯಿತು

ಕೆಲವೊಮ್ಮೆ ಪರಿಸ್ಥಿತಿಗೆ ಮಣಿದು ಪರ ರಾಜ್ಯಾ ಭಾಷೆಯನ್ನು ನಾವು ಬಳಸಬೇಕಾಗಬಹುದು. ರಾಷ್ಟ್ರೀಯ ಹೆದ್ದಾರಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಯಾರಾದರೂ ವಾಹನ ನಿಲ್ಲಿಸಿ ಬೇರೆ ಭಾಷೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ಜಾಗ ವಿಚಾರಿಸಿದರೆ ಬಹುಷ ಬೇರೆ ಊರಿನಿಂದ ಬಂದವರು ಎಂದುಕೊಂಡು ಸಹಾಯ ಮಾಡುವ ಉದ್ದೇಶದಿಂದ ಅವರಿಗೆ ಅರ್ಥೈಸುವ ಪ್ರಯತ್ನ ಮಾಡಿದರೆ ತಪ್ಪಿಲ್ಲ ಎಂದು ಭಾವಿಸುತ್ತೇನೆ. ಆದರೆ ನಮ್ಮದೇ ಊರು, ನಮ್ಮದೇ ಗಲ್ಲಿ, ಬೇರೆ ವಿಧಿಯಿಲ್ಲದ ಗ್ರಾಹಕರು, ಹೀಗಿದ್ದರೂ ನಮ್ಮ ಜನರೇ ಅನ್ಯ ಭಾಷಾ ಪ್ರಯೋಗ ಮಾಡುತ್ತಾರೆ ಎಂದರೆ ಏನು ಹೇಳೋನ?

ನನ್ನ ಪ್ರಕಾರ ನಮ್ಮ ಭಾಷೆ ಕೀಳು, ಬೇರೆ ಭಾಷೆಗಳು ನಮ್ಮದಕ್ಕಿಂತ ಉತ್ತಮ ಎಂಬ ತಪ್ಪು, ಆದರೆ ಗಾಢವಾದ, ನಂಬಿಕೆ ನಮ್ಮ ಜನರಲ್ಲಿ ಬಂದು ಬಿಟ್ಟಿದೆ. ಬಹುಷ ಬೇರೆ ಊರಿನಿಂದ ಬಂದ ಜನ, ಒಳ್ಳೆಯ ಉದ್ಯೋಗ ಪಡೆದು, ಒಳ್ಳೆಯ ಸಂಬಳ ಗಿಟ್ಟಿಸಿಕೊಂಡು, ಆರಾಮವಾಗಿ ಮಜ ಮಾಡುವದನ್ನು ನೋಡಿ, ಬೇರೆ ಏನೂ ವ್ಯತ್ಯಾಸ ಕಂಡು ಹಿಡಿಯಲಾರದೆ ಭಾಷೆಯಿಂದಲೇ ಅವರಿಗೆ ಉತ್ತಮತ್ವ ಬಂದಿರಬೇಕೆ ಎಂಬ ತಪ್ಪು ಕಲ್ಪನೆ ಇದೆಯೋ ಏನೋ.

ಕನ್ನಡದವರೇ ಆದ, ಉತ್ತಮ ಶಿಕ್ಷಣ, ಉದ್ಯೋಗ, ಸಾಮಾಜಿಕ ಸ್ಥಾನಮಾನ ಇರುವ ಜನರು, ಇಂಥಾ ಪರಿಸ್ಥಿತಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಮುಂದೆ ಬಂದು ಕನ್ನಡದ ಬಗ್ಗೆ, ಕನ್ನಡ ಭಾಷೆ, ಸಂಸ್ಕೃತಿಯ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಹೆಮ್ಮ ಮತ್ತು ಪ್ರೀತಿಯನ್ನು ಪ್ರದರ್ಶಿಸಬೇಕು. ಅವರ ಗಾಳಿ ಈ ಕಳವಳ ಮನಸ್ಥಿತಿಯಲ್ಲಿರುವ ಜನರಿಗೆ ತಾಗಿದರೆ ಕೊಂಚ ರೋಗ ಪರಿಹಾರ ಆಗಬಹುದೋ ಏನೋ?

Yesterday at one of the Adiga hotels in Bangalore, I saw this super-efficient waiter prepare finger-bowls for 2 customers.

Placed two bowls, poured steaming hot water into it, picked up a jug of cold water, mixed some cold water into both the bowls.

While walking towards the customer table, he “stirred” the water with his fingers and did a mock-test to ensure the water wasn’t too hot, lest the customer burn his hands.

The customers happily cleaned their hands and lips with this tested & certified water!

I’ll leave the MOS to you. But I decided to never again ask for a finger bowl in any restaurant.

One of the radio stations of late has started an initiative where they claim not to repeat songs within 24 hours. The plus point is that they are playing a lot of old, good songs and hence the station has become more “tunable”. But, while claiming to not repeat any song, they have a competition at the same time where they will deliberately repeat one song every hour and the caller needs to identify the repeated song.

For two days last week, when I was driving back home in the evening, I was listening to this particular RJ conducting this contest in the most bizarre fashion. It goes something like..

” If you think I repeated the song abraca-dabra-abraca in the last one hour, SMS me with YES or NO….. I think we have someone on the line….Hello, did I repeat that song?”

Caller – “Yes you did”.

RJ – “Soooooorrrrryyyy, I did not repeat that song. Anyways you get a 1000 rupee voucher from this dustbin company” (No, I am serious, they give a voucher from a dustbin company for giving the wrong answer)

Immediately after that, the RJ announces..

“Unfortunately, caller XYZ could not give the correct answer. But you can still call or SMS and win Rs 2000 vouchers if you give the correct answer”

I mean, how dumber can the contest get? If the question has only YES or NO as answer and one caller has said YES and you declared to the whole world that the answer was wrong, how can the contest continue?

The combination of rains and flyover constructions all over my journey from home to office means that my commute time is closing in on 2 hours (one way) this week. While I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping that the bunch of flyovers/underpasses will actually help ease traffic congestion and reduce commute time, I still have my own doubts.

I feel there are many simpler, obvious steps that can be taken which will significantly reduce congestion in Bangalore. Somehow, the authorities seem unwilling to implement these. One such step would be to eliminate bus stops close to traffic signals and junctions. It is a no-brainer that a bus standing right after a signal forces the traffic into a smaller section of the road, significantly impeding traffic clearance. Just as important it is to ensure traffic is regulated at a junction (by introducing traffic signals), it is equally important to ensure that the side which is allowed to move (due to a green signal) is provided a clear road ahead. Naturally, junctions would be the worst place to have bus stops!

My guess is that at least 90% of junctions in Bangalore with reasonable traffic have bus stops. Buses not only stop suddenly and haphazardly at these junctions, the lack of a “first-in-first-out” system at these stops means that many a times, the bus behind suddenly swirls to the right and attempts to overtake the one in front, only to realize there is not enough space. And murphy’s laws ensures that the bus in front has several passengers to pick up. Meanwhile the green signal turns to red and you are right where you were…

I was observing my route from home to office and there is a bus stop at almost every single junction! Here is a partial list..

1. Hulimavu junction – this one is special, the bus stop is right in the middle of the T junction, not at the end.
2. Arakere junction – bus stop just before the signal, ensuring only a 10ft wide road to the right for traffic to move once signal turns green
3. IIMB junction – bus stop right after junction
4. BG Road – Outer Ring Road junction – bus stop immediately after the junction
5. Ring Road – bus stop right after Jayadeva flyover ends. This one is special too as it completely blocks the road one takes if approaching from Dairy circle and turning left at Jayadeva flyover
6. Ring Road – Advaith Petrol Bunk junction – bus stop at junction, before signal
7. Priya Bakery junction – bus stop at junction, immediately after signal
8. Silk Board – bus stop immediately after junction. Though there is a bus bay here, at least half the buses park on the main road itself
9. Agara junction – bus stop right in the middle of the junction, in spite of the flyover construction
10. Outer ring road junction – bus stop as soon as you turn left at the junction
11. Bellandur junction – bus stop at junction, immediately after signal
12. Devarabisanahalli junction – stop after signal
13. PTP junction – bus stop right after signal

When our BBMP folks want to build flyovers, they seem to acquire land without any trouble. But can’t they do the same in order to build bus bays at these junctions. I guess bus bay construction is not very profitable when compared with flyover projects.

Yesterday, Samata and I were at a coffee shop near the Raghavendra Matha in Jayanagar 5th block. While waiting for our drink to arrive, my attention went towards the nearby traffic signal. As usual, I got into the mode of observing the violations that were occuring at the signal. Almost every signal turning from green to red led to a couple of “jumps”. On a sunday with hardly any traffic, people still couldn’t resist the temptation of disregarding the signal and jumping ahead.

At one corner of the signal, I spotted a beggar. His red shirt made him very evident on that junction. The guy was crawling on the road. Every time, the signal turned red and vehicles started to accumulate, he would crawl on the road using his hands and beg from the motorists. It was indeed a very pitiable sight. People were getting very disturbed seeing his plight and were offering “Bhiksha” generously. I captured a photo of this beggar. Take a look.

The beggar used to cover about 15-20 vehicles in one attempt. After a while, I started noticing that every time the signal turned red, the guy used to start from the same location – the beginning of the zebra crossing. I started to wonder how he made it back to the same location every time, and so quickly at that.  I kept my eyes on the same guy and the result – take a look at the below photo!

He was coolly walking back to his “crease”. The guy had a minor issue with his right leg. He was able to stand upright. He covered a distance of about 50m in less than 10 seconds.

Every time a vehicle came early to the junction and stopped before he took his position, he would avoid begging in that instance, lest the people questioned him. He would begin his job during the next iteration.

I wonder how the people around – the shopkeepers and others are turning a blind eye to this blatant con job. The guy is in a pretty good condition and can definitely do other jobs for a living. Perhaps the income from this business is just too good for him to switch to a real job. I observed him for about 15 mins and easily walked at least a kilometer in that time. Surely, he cannot be physically weak if he could walk that much, and at that pace.

This incident just reinforced my strong belief that most of the beggars in Bangalore are crooks and cons. Beware of them! Show them no mercy! Discouraging them is a small way of helping our city get rid of this menace.

a) Footpath

• A dedicated lane for two wheelers, including motorbikes, scooters and cycles.
• Only part of the road where pedestrians can (try to) walk without getting shouted at or abused – mostly.
• Parking space for two wheelers
• Place where one can buy vegetables, fruits, flowers and other ‘essentials’

b) One way road

• Road where a majority of traffic flows in one direction
• Road where one may need to drive slowly, and in a corner, if you are driving against the flow of traffic
• Road where one needs to honk continuously if driving against the normal flow of traffic

c) Service road

• A government introduced method to regulate traffic flow on busy roads.
• A method introduced to inject bottlenecks on busy roads by encouraging motorists to compete against the first-in-first-out principle of traffic flow
• Dedicated parking lot for trucks and other heavy vehicles

d) Road hump

• Man made construction to test the strength of the motorists’ spinal cord
• A tool to entice motorists into speeding. Typically deployed in a sequence that leads motorists to speed between two humps.
• Prime contributor to dents at the rear and bottom of vehicles

e) Road divider

• Government introduced mechanism to ensure revenue turnover and public spending by the City corporation, with natural benefic side effects for the project participants
• Mechanism to regulate self-created U-turns and Right turns by motorists
• Most patched/upgraded component of the road system

f) Jam

• Situation where more than one motorist attempts to enforce the fundamental right to his/her way. Typically occurs at a junction.
• A collision situation where none of the involved parties make any attempt at collision avoidance or collision prevention
• A situation arising out of a motorist not sticking to sub-point 2 under section “One way road”
• A situation which introduces an inexplicable desire to honk in motorists

g) Lane discipline

• An artificial situation arising out of a “Jam”. Applicable only to four wheelers.
• For two wheelers and autos, please refer “Lane driving” below

h) Lane driving

• A unique driving style adopted by two wheelers, and sometimes by auto drivers, where the motorist carves his way out of a Jam. Sometimes, this is implemented in a regular traffic signal as well. Involves manipulating the vehicle in the crevices between cars and other vehicles. Also involves a pattern of driving in parallel and then perpendicular to the slowly moving cars.
• Requires great driving and persuasive skills as car drivers are forced to let motorists ‘make way’
• Consistently recognized for contributions to the car scratch repair industry

i) Green signal

• Color of light emitted by electronic devices installed at junctions that prompt motorists to drive away at great speeds

j) Red signal

• Color of light emitted by electronic devices installed at junctions that prompt motorists to increase their speeds to significantly high levels
• In contrast, prolonged exposure to red signal can sometimes force vehicles to abruptly halt at junctions. The presence of a traffic policeman is known to increase this phenomenon greatly.

k) Amber signal

• Color of light emitted by electronic devices installed at junctions that greatly increases indecision and confusion amongst motorists
• It is noticed that the amber signal causes adverse reactions, sometimes forcing motorists to slow down but mostly prompting them to speed up
• Prime contributor to the hood-to-bumper collision phenomenon

l) Traffic policeman

• A government appointed institution dedicated to collect service charges from motorists for various actions performed
• Actions prompting toll charges from traffic policemen include left turn at a no-free-left turn junction, not halting vehicles even after sustained exposure to the “red signal”, appearing very young, etc
• Note that sometimes, simply riding a two wheeler could also attract attention from the traffic policeman
• Charges collected by the said institution fall into two categories – billable and non-billable, with non-billable charges being offered at a significant discount to regular prices
• Known worldwide for their unique style of pulling out the two wheeler key in the middle of the road thereby forcing the motorist to push his vehicle to the corner, thereby also regulating traffic by reducing speed of other nearby vehicles

The film stars of Karnataka are going to now protest - against the protest – to install a Charlie Chaplin statue. It does not matter if the only people claiming it as having a communal tinge are the ‘anti-protesters’ themselves. Looks like appropriateness should never be questioned. It does not matter if the statue looks out of place, being close to a temple – or the temple serenity gets destroyed, because of the statue nearby. Opposition because a temple is nearby is communal, according to the anti-protesters.

Now, the anti-protesters also highlight aspects of what Chaplin stood for, in order to make a case against the protests. Here is a quote…

“Film historians find the controversy doubly ironic because Chaplin had repeatedly expressed his opposition to organised religion, including Christianity“

I think its better not to step into that territory – about what Chaplin believed in, stood for, advocated, or got embroiled into. The following are from Wikipedia’s article on Charlie Chaplin….

“Chaplin’s political sympathies always lay with the left”

“For most of World War II he was fighting serious criminal and civil charges related to his involvement with actress Joan Barry”

“During the era of McCarthyism, Chaplin was accused of “un-American activities” as a suspected communist sympathizer and J. Edgar Hoover, who had instructed the FBI to keep extensive secret files on him, tried to end his United States residency”

“During World War I, Chaplin was criticised in the British press for not joining the Army”

“For Chaplin’s entire career, some level of controversy existed over claims of Jewish ancestry”

“Chaplin has also figured in the mysterious events surrounding the death of producer Thomas Ince aboard the yacht of William Randolph Hearst in 1924, one of Hollywood’s greatest mysteries”

“Chaplin’s lifelong attraction to younger women remains another enduring source of interest to some”

The article also details his involvement with at least 12 women in his lifetime, most of whom were very young compared to him.

The only reason for the statue seems to be the goal of obtaining a Guinness Record. Maybe the Guinness folks won’t consider the statue of any other Indian personality. Hmmm…

To top it all, the idea was to show the statue in a song sequence in a Kannada movie. And the movie story is “about two guys who are always stumbling on to new ideas to please their girlfriends”. I am wondering if the statue will be appropriate even in the movie, let alone the beach!

P.S: The movie is called “Housefull”. According to this report, Kannada movies cannot have non Kannada titles.